Today Is Going To Be A Good Day
Today is going to be a good day, getting ready for a special night away with friends.
I actually managed to get back to sleep after waking up at my usual time of 4:30 am so I'm well rested and ready to get stuff done. My nights are very restless - I talk, laugh, shout and fling my arms around in my sleep. A while back I even managed to throw myself out of bed.
When I leaned over to my husband Patrick and said in my sleep “I’ve got my eye on you” he decided to move into the guest room. This works well for both of us. I can listen to the radio while waiting for 7:00 am, which is when I take my first medication. Then when it starts to take effect, my day begins. I plan the days' activities around my 4 hourly medication because I have a rollercoaster level of energy and strength with the middle 2 hours being reliably good.
Top of today’s list of things to do is taking up the trousers I want to wear. They used to fit, but my shape and posture have changed and I need easy fastenings and loose fitting. I find the stud type buttons on jeans very difficult and have a horror of not being able to undo it when I’m out and need the loo.
I would never have imagined that getting in and out of clothes could be such a battle.
Next I must get on with some voice exercises. I speak so quietly that it’s difficult to join in a group conversation and I must remember to smile. My face is very droopy sometimes. I have developed some anxieties about group situations, being very conscious of my tremor, and that makes my voice even weaker. The group I'm seeing soon are very old friends so I should be ok. I’m determined to wear earrings for the night out, even if it takes me all day to get them in. Anything requiring dexterity is a problem and my handwriting is illegible.
One advantage of my Parkinson’s is that I can eat anything I fancy and don’t put on weight. After a lifetime of diets that’s much appreciated. After lunch I will need a nap to prepare for the Neuro Warrior class. The exercises keep me mobile and it’s good to chat with other Parky people. The only time it really gets me down is when I have something else wrong, like my recent knee injury, which meant I couldn’t exercise or do much for a few weeks.
I worried that my Parkinson symptoms would deteriorate and it seemed unfair, so I did wallow in self pity a bit!
One thing I wish I'd got on with is meditation. I find relaxing very difficult and am nervy and jumpy, which is not like the old me at all. Yet another thing to tackle!
All in all I’m probably much better after 9 years with Parkinson’s than I expected. I just have to accept that I’m slow and need to plan around the ups and downs of my medication. Sometimes it feels exhausting to be constantly fighting Parkinson's. No wonder the exercises are called PD Warrior. Still, it could be worse!
